Friday, August 12, 2011

Where has the Summer gone?????


summers gone



Wow, hard to believe it has been so long since my last post....the days of Summer are dwindling down, the kids are starting back to school and I have been as busy as ever. The desire to post anything on this blog has not been there for me. My life is kind of monotonous....same routine, day in and day out. Work, try to make it to the gym (although for the past few months, that too has been half-assed)....take care of the house, spend time with the hubby and the kids when they have been around. Pretty much, the two younger kids have spent the entire summer, give or take, away....Aaron spent weeks at at time with his real Dad and that side of his family, while Max...lived his days at the lake with Grandma and Grandpa...I missed them. But, it wasn't fair to keep them cooped up in the house all day during their summer break, While I worked every day and Keith tried to rest (since he works 3rd shift)..therefore, he had to sleep and they couldn't go outside or do anything until he was up for the day...so arrangements were made and they were gone for most of the summer...with "visits" with me and and their Dad(step-dad)....
Anyway, they came home on Wednesday and they start back to school next Tuesday. Aaron will be in 5th grade and Max is going into 2nd....I hope it is an easy year for both of them. With Aaron's ADD and Max's ADHD...school has been a constant battle and I am not looking forward to the evenings ahead battling with them over homework and bedtimes....

All of that aside...it seems like the Summer flew by..technically, we have a few more weeks left on the calender for the season we call "Summer"...and I love Fall, so that's ok..but, I am not looking forward to Winter...Winters here in Indiana can be pretty rough and I dread the cold and snow. As it is, I have started training for a Fall Half Marathon and am currently in my 3rd week. My fitness level is so much worse at this time then what it was this time last year...I have really slacked off on weight training so I have pretty much lost all my muscle tone that I had...I keep fighting a 5 lb weight gain that started after my half-marathon in May and the scale goes up and down, driving me batty as hell. Some weeks, I manage 6 workouts, others I may only get 4....so, I really need to buckle down, be more consistent, with a minimum of 5 workouts a week, 5 hours of cardio and 3 of those days for weight training as well. I am really unhappy with the way I look right now...the scale may say 112 lbs, but it is a "skinny fat" 112 lbs...I need to refocus on my eating and cardio/strength training, cut out the wine (I love my wine-so that's going to be hard) and I know I can get it back...I have just lost my motivation...wish I could figure out how to get it back....

Seriously, I have been kind of depressed lately...I find no joy in my job, no joy in my workouts-they are just another "chore" to me...to keep me from getting fat again....I am obsessed with the freaking scale..weighing myself every single morning...and it seriously ruins my day when I see it tap that 115 mark...for so long, I was consistent, at 110...now every day it is up/down, up/down...driving me nuts. I think I have some kind of stomach issues, my belly stays so bloated...I look like I am four months pregnant somedays..then somedays not so bad...I can't help but wonder if I have IBS or something. There always seems to be something wrong. Today, I was at the dentist with teeth/gum problems.....I seriously feel as if I am falling apart. This getting old thing sucks big time...and to think, next month, I have another freaking birthday. Guess I should be grateful that I am still having them though, huh?

Well, since I totally made this post into a depressing whine session, I am going to stop now. I am hitting up the gym tonight after work...for a solid 2 hr 30 min run/abs/weight session....Since I only did an hour of cardio(3.9 mile run/elliptical) on Monday and 55 min of cardio Tuesday (3.1 mile run and 25 min on elliptical) no work out on Weds/Thurs(due to family obligations), I plan on working out Saturday and Sunday too. I have got to get this flabby old lady body back in shape...cause when Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

Have a Good Weekend!

No comments: